The story has to be what? Maybe 350 words? About a missing cat.
Yep. Page 3A of The Lancaster News has a story about a missing cat.
It "showed up missing," a phrase that never ceases to crack me up. Do I need to explain why?
I feel badly for the 90-year-old woman whose cat is missing, but I'm pretty skeptical that someone would enter the home and carry her away, as the owner asserts. "I think somebody opened the door, came in, put her in their jacket and walked away with her."
Huh.
There's no mention that the owner is missing anything else. No TVs, jewelry, crocheted toilet paper covers....just an orange tabby cat.
In other local news, I hear there is a group that wants to pay to paint the new Indian Land water tower. The water tower, which was a subject of much controversy when our school board decided to sell an acre of land right besmack in front of the main entrance to the school, will be set right on the corner of Doby Bridge and Highway 521. This group from Lancaster would like to offer to beautify the tower by paying to have it painted.
What would they paint on it, you ask?
Something to point visitors to Lancaster, of course. Something to encourage them to drive 20 miles south to shop at Wal-Mart and Eckerds in Lancaster rather than 7 miles north to Carolina Place Mall, Target, Barnes & Noble, Harris Teeter...I could go on.
But my readers are not stooopid...
1 comment:
Yeah, and that new B&N...well, I could just move in. And now they're building a massive shopping center at the end of my street. I may be able to do all my shopping on foot.
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